Time to Focus

After all of the celebrating (birthday parties, holiday parties, pre-surgery parties), traveling (Seattle, Portland, Santa Barbara, Monterey, New York City, D.C., Arizona, New Mexico, Texas, Oklahoma, Arkansas, Tennessee, North Carolina) and crazily fun times, I'm taking time this week to slow down and get down to business. Don't get me wrong -- I'm still living life in super-HDTV and having lots of fun, but it's time to focus, to get myself mentally, spiritually, and physically prepared for the main event on Thursday.

You see, ever since the day I learned of my diagnosis, I've been preparing for Thursday morning. Throughout all the fun and games of the last few months (and I mean that without a hint of sarcasm and, if you've followed my daily adventures, you know it), there was always a goal, a challenge, an endpoint -- my upcoming surgery. While it's not THE endpoint -- the CT scan results showing not a speck of "the cancer" (otherwise known as "NED" or "No Evidence of Disease" to cancer aficionados) is the actual endpoint -- it's a huge, huge step. Dr. Sugarbaker will pick out every visible speck of "the cancer," the heated chemo will kill every baby cell and baby's baby cell of “the cancer,” and at the end of the day, I'll be pretty darn NED. The three months of chemo that will follow surgery are a victory lap, really.

My training, my preparation for Thursday morning has manifested itself in many different ways -- my total diet overhaul, intense workouts at Educogym, acupuncture sessions with Mary Ellen, reiki sessions with Aymee's mom, painting, meditation, prayer, blog writing, traveling, celebrating, chilling out with friends and family, and meeting Coach K. It was all preparation. It was all priming my body, mind, and spirit for the challenge of this major surgery and the even larger challenge of beating the hell out of Stage IV cancer. And now, just days before the big day, I couldn't be more ready. My body is healthy and fit, nourished by healthy foods at every meal and stronger than ever. My mind is focused like a prize fighter's -- welcoming the challenge calmly and self-assuredly, prepared for surgery and post-surgery, knowing that I am really, really ready for this. And my spirit is more buoyant than it's ever been -- my heart is overflowing with love and gratitude. The support that I've received from everyone -- my three nurses and the rest of my loving family, classmates and teachers from Kindergarten to law school, former teammates and coaches, friends and parents of friends and grandparents of friends -- has supercharged my spirit in a way that is hard to explain in words. Your support gives me confidence -- supreme confidence -- in myself, and in the fact that I will prevail. For that, I'll be forever thankful for all of the beautiful people in my life. In no small part, you have helped give me the power and the courage not only to wage war on "the cancer," but to get through each battle while feeling joy, peace, and utter happiness.

I've got my game face on, everyone. I'm ready for battle with a strong body, a stronger mind, and the strongest spirit.