Next?
Part of my cancer-killing philosophy is -- calmly and coolly -- taking it one step at a time.
I remember that back in my early days of dealing with my diagnosis, staying true to that statement wasn't so easy. I'd love getting through each round of chemo and count down the days until I could be finished with treatment completely. That mentality made the time after the Sugarbaker surgery and before I got back on FOLFOX -- around March of last year -- one of the more frustrating times in my cancer-killing adventures. Back in the younger years of WunderGlo, I was all about barreling forward, knocking down each challenge, and getting to the finish line.
But these days, the finish line is not so clear. It may not even exist.
Because my most recent surgery didn't result in every speck of cancer being removed from my body, I have a longer road ahead of me. The dream of being totally cured and cancer-free is just not in the cards for me -- not in the immediate future, at least.
But you know what?
So what?!
Has cancer stopped me from enjoying my life? Has it kept me from working out or practicing law or launching The WunderGlo Foundation? Has it stopped me from DJing or writing my book? Has it stopped me from traveling to Hawaii or Durham or Santa Fe or Vegas or London (or Paris)? Has it stopped me from enjoying my wonderful family and friends? Has it stopped me from taking in -- each and every day -- the immense beauty of this world?
Nope. It hasn't done any of that.
So my attitude in this cancer-killing adventure of mine, no matter how long or arduous it might be, is simple. After I conquer each challenge ahead of me, be it a surgery or a round of chemo, my immediate question is: next? Because I'm ready for more. More fighting, more learning, more leading by example, and most importantly, more LIVING.
So what is next for me? Chemo -- of the FOLFIRI plus Avastin variety. The same chemo that got my CEA tumor marker from the high 30s to 5 points away from normal. Yup, that good stuff. I start on Monday with Round 21, and I'm more than ready to collaborate with chemo in some serious cancer-killing. And I'll continue on with it until I'm in remission. We don't know when that will be, or how much chemo it will take to get there, but be assured that I'll get there. I have no doubt that I'll get there.
From an emotional and mental standpoint, this disease can break you down...or it can build you up. It can strip you down to nothing or it can be a launching pad for enlightenment and growth. Staring death in the face could frighten a person, or it could make that person fearless. You all know which path I've chosen. I've never let cancer get the better of me. Instead, I've allowed it to better me. And for that, I can't be anything but grateful for my diagnosis. Seriously.
So in this cancer-killing adventure of mine, just know that no matter how long it takes to officially beat this disease -- regardless of the pain or frustration or duration -- your pal WunderGlo will have just one thing in mind after enduring challenge after challenge. One audacious sentiment. One simple question.
Next?
Because I'm not giving up. Not ever.
Reader Comments