Back In the Mix and Loving It

Much of Labor Day weekend was spent in the office. I was there until 10pm on Friday night (don't worry, Will kept me company), almost all day on Saturday, and spent a good part of the morning and early afternoon there on Sunday and Monday. Needless to say, the case I'm on is really, really busy at the moment, but I'm loving it. After all, this is what I've wanted to do my entire life, and this is what was cruelly ripped away from me about a year ago when "the cancer" tried to railroad my life by...you know...ending it. I'm working hard, learning new things every day, and enjoying every moment of it.

One of the best parts of being back at O'Melveny -- especially when things are really busy -- is that I forget all about this cancer business for a while.

It's not like I'm constantly thinking about cancer. I'm certainly not anxious or freaking out about the cancer that may or may not be living in my body. But the thought of "cancer" is floating around in my mind during the majority of most days. I usually think about it conceptually, rather than as a part of my personal situation -- as part of the work I'm doing with The WunderGlo Foundation or when I'm emailing with a patient. Sometimes I think about it as it pertains to my own body -- like when I'm having blood work done or taking my daily vitamins. But no matter the context, it's always there. Thoughts about cancer in one form or another are always there.

But when work gets cranking -- when I'm focused on a big project or meeting with a client or in the middle of a legal proceeding -- something magical happens. I get so engrossed in what I'm doing -- the facts and the law, advocating on behalf of my client, the intellectual challenge of it all -- that I TOTALLY forget about cancer. I forget how it is and will always be a part of my life. I forget about the things it took from me. I forget about all the things it taught me. In those moments, I am just a normal lawyer, wearing a suit, doing the things lawyers do. And while I don't want to escape the life, challenges, and responsibilities that cancer has had a part in shaping -- in fact, I embrace and cherish that life -- I still love those moments of pure, unadulterated, utterly conventional normalcy. A total victory over this idiotic disease.

I'll be finding out my scan results very, very soon. But there's no time to fret about that. I've got work to do!